The "C" Word

Not cancer.

Not Cindy.

The word of the day is chorizo.

For the uninitiated, chorizo is a fatty pork sausage seasoned with chili, paprika and garlic. Chorizo—and eggs—is what Susan tucked into this morning. (Oh, and rosemary potatoes, tortillas, and a dab of guacamole.)

Now that I'm over my cold, I figured it was safe to see Smooky. We decided to meet at The Taco Spot, one of our favorite hangouts, for a late breakfast. Her platter was enormous, but she ate most of it, and then packed up the rest for an afternoon snack.

I'm here to say she is chowing down the calories. But when will her metabolism get the memo?

Our girl is skinny. When she says she has "no junk in the trunk," she's lying like a dawg. There is no trunk! She has no booty.

Frankly, I don't know how her pants stay up. (Suspenders? Duct tape? Faith?)

However, now that her taste buds have bounced back, she can once again enjoy subtleties in flavor and seasonings. And if she keeps eating like a longshoreman, she's bound to return to her fightin' weight very soon.

In the meantime, feel free to suggest your favorite high-calorie, diet-busting treat. You may inspire Susan to binge on your behalf.

Here are my ideas:

1. Thirsty? Conserve water. Try a nice milkshake or two.
2. Grilled cheese sandwiches with double cheese.
3. Deep fried…anything.